Can I have some? - The Simpsons

High as a kite

You're like a blackjack dealer at the flavor town casino

I noticed you're wearing open-toed shoes - Since when did you become a whore? - Dwight Schrute

Drug-addled candor - Sheldon

I'm alone and I love it

Just because you're a lesbian, it doesn't make you less of a bein - The Simpsons

I am the mack daddy

Ralph you're not a kangaroo

This isn't gonna be about Jesus, is it? - The Simpsons

I have absolutely no idea what's goin on - Homer Simpson

Fight the power - Simpsons

Bitch who asked you? - A bitch who didn't asked you

How the fuck can a peanut kill someone, it's not even a person

Where did you learn all of this? - Internet

Why can't women parallel park?

Could you speak up? I'm not wearing pants

Grab that little hoe

Is there life after birth?

I hate men but I'm not a lesbian

dat holy ass

So some penguins turn to a life of crime

What was it Shakespeare said? - He said a lot of things Jeremy

Didn't you read Lords of the ring in high school?

I hate you!

I feel very welcome here

I completely agree with myself

Super Nintendo Chalmers

Everyone sucks but me

Am I perfect? - Yes I am

The worst day of your life so far - Simpsons

I see basic bitches

Jim tell him where he can stick his grapes

I can fix that

Gay Interest - The Simpsons

The evil queens are the princesses that were never saved

That sad moment when you realize the trash goes out more than you

You can't have any fun in bed - The Simpsons

In the end being lazy at home is the best

Cradle of Filth I presume that's a band - IT Crowd

Why do we, as a society, hate old people so much? - Because they're lame - The Office

Stoner's Pot Palace - Simpsons

To start press any key - The Simpsons

Loud full-hearted bitching

Drinks milk angrily

Hillary's husband

I'm a locksmith

Seriously all you do is bitch

How do you make a pact with the Devil?

Homer are you wearing a tie to impress Laddie?

We're not only proud about that, we're smug about it

Your tears say more than real evidence ever could

Look at me - I'm captain now

Laughing - Crying

Jolly Gummibears

I love you - Thank you

People are so fucking annoying

Twinkle twinkle little star point me to the nearest bar

I was normal three cats ago

Get rich or drunk trying

I relish your wit

We have unlimited juice?

It's a fashion risk but I like it

Whay am I even alive?

Deja Poo

To poor decisions - The Simpsons

I hate the idea that someone out there hates me - The Office

Live each day like it was your last - The Simpsons

hey potato chips come out I want to eat you

Saying Goodbye Is The Most Painful Way Of Solving A Problem

What position is this? - The American Taxpayer - The Simpsons

I'm so happy you're eating again

Kiss the best way to shut a girl up

Kids! They grow up so fast, they move out so slow

Do not touch WIlly - The Simpsons

This is just smoke and ash - Simpsons

[softly] Don't - Michael Scott (The Office)

Here's to respecting women

Put the mind control into the country music

I'm so happy and not at all jelous

I know you can read my thoughts, boy - Meow meow meow - The Simpsons

Rich Bitch - Homer Simpson

Wifi, coffee, my bed - Perfection

So you're one of those "don't call me a chick" chicks? - The Simpsons

Some vanilla bullshit latte cappa thing

Who will love you? Who will fight?

I'm not anti-social - I'm anti-idiot

I'm a sign not a cop - Simpsons

Unicorn - Michael Scott

I got nothing to lose

69 - The Office

Take me out of what?

It's like a sauna in here

[thinks of daddy in Spanish]

One, two, three - The Office

Fuck Your Guns

Recognize Missouri - Grampa Simpson

Realize how blessed you are

I bring you love - Break it's legs - The Simpsons

I don't feel right - Ralph Wiggum

U2 moving crew - Simpsons