It's a fashion risk but I like it

49 stars on that flag

Springfield Sperm Bank - Simpsons

A man's gotta eat - Trailer Park Boys

You're like a blackjack dealer at the flavor town casino

When a pregnant woman swims she is a human submarine

Wow, I have a lot of people to disappoint

I am not nice

Straight Outta Shape

What is the national language of the United States? - Third grade english

Dishes! We meet again you dirty bastards!

You can't have any fun in bed - The Simpsons

God thanks for nothing - Bart Simpson

Do wasps make honey?

I'm not like most girls?

If you want to be happy - Don't think

Before calling me ask yourself - Is this textable?

Just because you're a lesbian, it doesn't make you less of a bein - The Simpsons

Don't look at me

You underestimate my power

I don't think I feel well

Springfield Psychiatric Center

Soulmate: someone who is happy to eat the pizza toppings you don't like

People who use a lot of swear words

IDGAF = I don't give away food

Fight the power - Simpsons

My Diabolical Plan - Dwight Schrute

Ernie how do I look? - With your eyes Bert

Dad do you wear boxers or briefs? - No - The Simpsons

I did it to be amazing

[thinks of daddy in Spanish]

Marge it's 3 am, shouldn't you be baking - The Simpsons

You guys from Florida?

Too many assholes not enough bullets

I love you - Thank you

I'm not anti-social - I'm anti-idiot

I relish your wit

Yessica it's like Jessica but ethnic

I am so excited I may vomit

Poop backwards is poop

I like being alone too much

I miss my pre-internet brain

Child Psychiatrist - Simpsons

The center of a donut is 100% fat free

I wonder what the non-pathetic people are doing tonight - The Big Bang Theory

So you're one of those "don't call me a chick" chicks? - The Simpsons

I already won the lottery - I was born in the USA

Do not touch WIlly - The Simpsons

But my mom says I'm cool - Milhouse Van Houten - The Simpsons

Sometimes I have inside jokes with myself

Being an adult is terrible

This is uncool - X-Files

Hello 911? How are you?

Die Bart Die

A man with dreams needs a woman with vision

Sometimes all you need is 500 million dollars

His problem is he is an asshole

I see basic bitches

Owning your okayness - The Simpsons

I don't like you I just want to have sex with you

By the way I faked every orgasm

So you've decided to steal cable

I have an art blog

You people have been blisters on my taint

Animal Hospital - The animals are the patients - Community

But I want to hurt people, not animals

We've tried nothing and we're all out of ideas - The Simpsons

I bring you love - Break it's legs - The Simpsons

Pippety poppety give me the zoppety

Unflattering test results

I am not nice

I'm funny right? What do you know? You're a door

We're not only proud about that, we're smug about it

Start with a compliment

That is so gay - The Simpsons

Wish you were here

I'm in no condition to drive - I shouldn't listen myself I'm drunk - Homer Simpson

Now entering Winnipeg

Ernest goes somewhere cheap - Simpsons

By the way I faked every orgasm

Jim, I'm not easy to manage

You-are-gay - Uruguay - Homer Simpson

I wish I could be a cat

Party Hardy it's Friday

Every day is like Halloween

My boss told me to have a good day so I went home

Silly girl - He doesn't care

Metaphors? I hate metaphors

OK less gay

I'm dying

Not today old friend - Moe Szyslak - The Simpsons

I fucking trusted you

Am I out of touch? - Skinner

Can't they get a pole for that sign? - Simpsons

I am so angry

My fear is that PMS doesn't exist

Me overweight mom dresses too sexy

Someone will die - Of fun

I've tried hitting it - I've tried yelling at it - The Simpsons

Recognize Missouri - Grampa Simpson

So it was you who made the floor slippery